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Hi Everybody,
Ryan’s service here in Kenya was on August 15. It was good.
We are planning our trip to the states and I can share some of those dates.
We fly from Nairobi to North Carolina on September 2 and 3. Ryan’s parents live in Garner, NC. This is our first trip without Ryan. Our kids are Caleb age 8, Levi age 6, Seth age 4, and Chloe is almost 3. I hope and pray the three airplane rides and two layovers go smoothly.
My in-laws are lending me their van and we are driving to FL on September 18 to attend Frank Toews Memorial Service in Leesburg on the 19th. My sisters, Diane and Debra, are flying in on Wednesday the 23rd . Friends of ours, the Williamsons, have opened up their home to us. On the 24th we are going to Disney! Diane, Debra, 4 kids, and myself. A dear friend who I have yet to meet is giving me 5 tickets. My parents and In-laws arrive on the 25th and Ryan’s Florida Memorial Service will be on Saturday the 26th.
First Baptist Church of Oviedo
45 W Broadway
Oviedo FL 32765
I’ll let you know the time when it’s decided.
First Baptist is Ryan and I’s home church. I am looking forward to worshipping with them on the 27th. We will drive back to NC on the 28th.
October 1 is Chloe’s 3rd birthday, we will probably fly from NC to NY and spend a few days at AIM’s office in Pearl River. On October 4 we will probably fly to MI to be with my family. On Saturday, October 10 we will have another Memorial Service in Holland. I am still deciding on the venue and time. October 14 would have been Ryan and I’s 9th anniversary.
Sometime in the middle of October, Tiffany (Frank’s wife who also died in the crash and one of my best friends) are being whisked away. Just the two of us (and none of our 8 kids) are going on a retreat. Our counseling center here in Nairobi is planning a special retreat for us. We asked them to plan it for us while we are in the states. So far they have 3 options for us to consider, in MI and PA. Tiffany and I want to grieve well and are open to receiving all the help we can get to do this. I am looking forward to it already, for a safe place to laugh and grieve with my friend.
On October 28, me and the kids are off on another road trip to Wausau WI to spend a long weekend with my brother and sister-in-law and their 3 kids. We drive back to MI on November 2. Sometime that week, we will fly back to NC and spend those last days seeing Ryan’s family before we fly to our home in Nairobi on November 17 and 18.
After all these flights and road trips, I hope I will have started adjusting to traveling with 4 small kids and no husband. I am not looking forward to it, and hope I have the freedom to cry and be mad when I need to. But I also hope we can have A LOT of fun.
I shared a lot of details. I hope you print this up and post it on your refrigerator or place it in your Bible and pray for us on each day, knowing what we are doing on those days. When I have the domestic flights, I’ll clarify those dates for you.
Thanks
Dawn and the 4 kiddos.
Ps. We are returning to Kenya, I will share more about that in the future. But I am certain that God wants us here and he will supply a ministry for me. I have some good possibilities already to consider.
Pss. I share a lot of daily information on Face book. Please find me as your friend and keep up more regularly with what those crazy, adventurous Williams are up to next.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Breakfast in the game park
On May 2, we took the kids and my parents to the Nairobi game park for a late breakfast.
Ryan and the boys looking for hippos or anything else intersting.
We found a great place to make a picnic breakfast without any baboons to disturb us. It was up on a ridge, so the kids looked for animals with the binnoculars.
Ryan set up his ancient Coleman camp stove and we fried bacon and eggs.
Oma looking out at the view with Seth and Chloe.
Ryan and the boys looking for hippos or anything else intersting.
We found a great place to make a picnic breakfast without any baboons to disturb us. It was up on a ridge, so the kids looked for animals with the binnoculars.
Ryan set up his ancient Coleman camp stove and we fried bacon and eggs.
Oma looking out at the view with Seth and Chloe.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
One of many Tributes
This is written in the program for Ryan's service. Wish you could have been there.
Ryan loved to work on airplanes...
but in reality, anything that moved or made noise, he was into it. He was often doing something with a piki –his, yours, anybody who needed a hand doing something, he was there giving his time and his ability with no questions asked. You could find him tinkering at his toolbox with a toy helicopter for his boys, trying to make it fly again. Or one time, he was making a little kitchen for Chloe out of some odds and ends he had picked up around town. There was even a time he was trying to get this ancient looking juicer going again for Dawn. He hauled it down to the Industrial Area and back again a couple times, trying to get it working again. Now, his toolbox sits silently in the corner of the hangar, a vacant reminder of a man gifted in many ways, a man who will be greatly missed.
He was a great mentor to many people who worked alongside of him in the hangar. He took the time to teach a young mechanic how to do a specific task, and then helped along the way when questions arose. He loved to do sheetmetal; there was no project that he would do that came out with bad results. He cared about the work that he did and took pride in keeping those airplanes flying safely. It was not a matter of working just to do work, but doing work that would honor the Lord. His heart burned for not only for the work of aircraft maintenance, but for the work that AIM AIR took part in throughout Kenya and East Africa. He served his Lord well so that others could also serve through medical missions, church planting, famine relief, Bible translation, and a host of other ministries.
His ministries were not only limited to AIM AIR, however. He was fully involved in his local church and took seriously the call to be God’s witness throughout the remotest parts of the earth. He tirelessly gave his time and his abilities to help with famine relief throughout the Ukambani region. At least one Saturday a month for the past several months, he spent all day driving his van full of people all over that region, helping to distribute food to people who just don’t have anything due to the famine in Kenya. Most people complain about being stuck in traffic in Nairobi for an hour; he never complained about being hot and sweaty and stinky in a van for twelve hours out in the middle of nowhere.
Most importantly, though, he loved his Lord and he loved his family. While he loved working on airplanes, his heart was always longing to be at home with his wife Dawn and his four children – Caleb, Levi, Seth, and Chloe. You knew he loved his family; it was most evident to us in the hangar around the kids’ birthdays. They would show up with him and spend “a day with Dad at work.” He would let them turn wrenches with him and go for an engine run on one of the 206s. They would ride on the dispatch bicycles down the ramp to look at all the other airplanes. They would go and get Kenyan food, because his boys love it so much, even if he wasn’t really in the mood for it that day. Meeting Dawn was perhaps the best thing to happen to him; they met here in Kenya, both doing the Lord’s work. She has been a helpmeet and a strong support for him; even after he joined Frank in glory, so many have marveled at the inner strength she has displayed. Whether it was fixing her juicer or taking her to a movie where they were the only ones in the theater, he loved his wife and cared for her with utmost attention.
This is the testimony of Ryan Williams, that he loved his Lord without reservation. He followed God’s leading and when the time came, he gave his all for the sake of the Gospel. God called his friend Frank Toews home immediately; Ryan, He chose to wait a little bit before calling him home. We don't know why, but He has a reason. We can just imagine that when Ryan entered His Savior's arms, he heard that big laugh of Frank in the background. So now Ryan has joined that great cloud of witnesses that Scripture talks about. We look forward to the day when we shall see our beloved husband, father, son, brother, and friend again, but for now, we must continue on in our journey. God has called each one of us for a special purpose. As Ryan stepped out into glory, we must step up into his place and continue to carry the Gospel to those who still have not heard. Human minds cannot conceive what lies ahead...but God knows. With that knowledge, we must rest in the loving arms of the Savior, arms that also hold our beloved Ryan with Him in glory.
Written by Nathan Roberts
Ryan loved to work on airplanes...
but in reality, anything that moved or made noise, he was into it. He was often doing something with a piki –his, yours, anybody who needed a hand doing something, he was there giving his time and his ability with no questions asked. You could find him tinkering at his toolbox with a toy helicopter for his boys, trying to make it fly again. Or one time, he was making a little kitchen for Chloe out of some odds and ends he had picked up around town. There was even a time he was trying to get this ancient looking juicer going again for Dawn. He hauled it down to the Industrial Area and back again a couple times, trying to get it working again. Now, his toolbox sits silently in the corner of the hangar, a vacant reminder of a man gifted in many ways, a man who will be greatly missed.
He was a great mentor to many people who worked alongside of him in the hangar. He took the time to teach a young mechanic how to do a specific task, and then helped along the way when questions arose. He loved to do sheetmetal; there was no project that he would do that came out with bad results. He cared about the work that he did and took pride in keeping those airplanes flying safely. It was not a matter of working just to do work, but doing work that would honor the Lord. His heart burned for not only for the work of aircraft maintenance, but for the work that AIM AIR took part in throughout Kenya and East Africa. He served his Lord well so that others could also serve through medical missions, church planting, famine relief, Bible translation, and a host of other ministries.
His ministries were not only limited to AIM AIR, however. He was fully involved in his local church and took seriously the call to be God’s witness throughout the remotest parts of the earth. He tirelessly gave his time and his abilities to help with famine relief throughout the Ukambani region. At least one Saturday a month for the past several months, he spent all day driving his van full of people all over that region, helping to distribute food to people who just don’t have anything due to the famine in Kenya. Most people complain about being stuck in traffic in Nairobi for an hour; he never complained about being hot and sweaty and stinky in a van for twelve hours out in the middle of nowhere.
Most importantly, though, he loved his Lord and he loved his family. While he loved working on airplanes, his heart was always longing to be at home with his wife Dawn and his four children – Caleb, Levi, Seth, and Chloe. You knew he loved his family; it was most evident to us in the hangar around the kids’ birthdays. They would show up with him and spend “a day with Dad at work.” He would let them turn wrenches with him and go for an engine run on one of the 206s. They would ride on the dispatch bicycles down the ramp to look at all the other airplanes. They would go and get Kenyan food, because his boys love it so much, even if he wasn’t really in the mood for it that day. Meeting Dawn was perhaps the best thing to happen to him; they met here in Kenya, both doing the Lord’s work. She has been a helpmeet and a strong support for him; even after he joined Frank in glory, so many have marveled at the inner strength she has displayed. Whether it was fixing her juicer or taking her to a movie where they were the only ones in the theater, he loved his wife and cared for her with utmost attention.
This is the testimony of Ryan Williams, that he loved his Lord without reservation. He followed God’s leading and when the time came, he gave his all for the sake of the Gospel. God called his friend Frank Toews home immediately; Ryan, He chose to wait a little bit before calling him home. We don't know why, but He has a reason. We can just imagine that when Ryan entered His Savior's arms, he heard that big laugh of Frank in the background. So now Ryan has joined that great cloud of witnesses that Scripture talks about. We look forward to the day when we shall see our beloved husband, father, son, brother, and friend again, but for now, we must continue on in our journey. God has called each one of us for a special purpose. As Ryan stepped out into glory, we must step up into his place and continue to carry the Gospel to those who still have not heard. Human minds cannot conceive what lies ahead...but God knows. With that knowledge, we must rest in the loving arms of the Savior, arms that also hold our beloved Ryan with Him in glory.
Written by Nathan Roberts
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Life between Ryan's death and his memorial service
Hi Friends,
A nice article was placed in the paper of Holland MI, where I grew up. I’ve sent the link.
I went to Frank’s memorial service on Tuesday. His life glorified God and the service honored the man Frank was.
Now I am in the middle of planning Ryan’s service for Saturday. My pastor is working on the service. I’ve asked several people to share memories of Ryan. Our media team is putting together a video to be shown at the service, and countless other details are being attended too.
The kids are doing well enough. I think they are in shock and disbelief, grieving appropriately. Chloe and Seth can tell me that daddy died, but don’t really understand. Caleb and Levi understand much more.
I’m tired. Last week was consumed with supporting Tiffany as she grieved for Frank, visiting Ryan in the hospital and being his advocate, and trying to keep my kids needs met. This week is grieving, accepting help from both my parents and Ryan’s parents who are all here, and being loved by my missionary family. I would say I am in denial. I know it’s true, but I can’t believe it deep down inside. I’m not looking for him, but have been too surrounded by people to feel lonely yet.
In South Africa, I was able to spend as much time as I needed with the body that Ryan left behind. I truly was able to say good-bye and grieve then. His memorial service will be videoed, I think this will be important for the kids to see again as they get older. To hear what others said about their dad. Right now I’m not nervous about Saturday. I don’t care if I stay strong or if I break down and weep. Both are ok with me.
Next week I will return to the job of getting Chloe’s paperwork finished. That kind of went on hold when I flew to SA on Friday, I didn’t get there in time to see him alive but am so glad I got to see him one last time. The coffin is sealed now, so that was my last time. And this week, I needed to take a week off from adoption. I don’t see any problems ahead with our traveling to the USA in the next few weeks. I hope to have two more memorial services, one in Florida and one in Michigan. I will keep you posted.
Then in October or November me and the kids plan to return to Kenya to finish this term. Our Home Assignment is still planned for March 2010. We will be spending one year in the states, as Ryan and I had originally planned. Then I feel I will be able to make better decisions about what my ministry might look like when we come back to Kenya. Ryan and I talked a lot about what we each would do if we lost each other. And we both wanted to remain on the field because we both felt called to missions. AIM is very supportive and willing to work with me on that.
Thanks for all your prayers, believe me, I feel them.
Dawn
http://www.hollandsentinel.com/lifestyle_religion/x1528790702/Holland-mom-widowed-after-missionary-plane-crashes-in-Africa
Monday, August 10, 2009
A friends perspective of Ryan
My girl friend (college roommate) wrote this. I edited a few things but otherwise it is from her perspective, and I like it very much.
From Lisa Van Zoest:
I am at Dan's office today (on Aug. 8), with a need just to absorb and to process what has happened. I invite you today to remember Ryan and Dawn's life and their impact on our own with me. I have a pile of toilet paper next to me on the desk, as I know that this will not be easy. But, the mental health professional in me knows that it is necessary.
We do not currently have internet working at our house, so it has been difficult to keep up to date with what has been happening with Ryan since we arrived in Nicaragua. So, the last we were able to check was yesterday morning. At that time we picked up the message from Dawn saying that Ryan was "unstable" which was "very concerning". This morning, as I was waking up, Ryan was on my mind as he has been all week as I wake up. But, this morning was different. It felt to me that something was very wrong and I began praying with passion that God would save his life. After a few minutes of pleading with God, the thought occurred to me that if Ryan were to live, he would need to endure and work through a great deal of physical, emotional, and mental pain here on this earth. With that thought, I was able to surrender and ended my prayer with "not my will Father, but yours be done."
From there, I got up and asked Dan if he would check face book for me. He left the house to find an internet connection and when he came back, he said, "he passed away". These are just words a person is never ready to hear no matter how much you expect that it is a possibility. The kids were asking me questions shortly after I received this news, and I would look at them blankly and could not focus on what they were saying. I thought about Dawn and how she has four pairs of eyes looking up at her, asking questions that are so much more profound than, "Mom, could you cut my bagel?"
I've been reviewing in my mind throughout today the ways in which God used both Ryan and Dawn to influence our lives in regard to living lives of surrender to whatever God calls us to do – regardless of the cost. Dawn's call to missions came when she was just a little girl – I think she was 5 – and throughout her life, she was surrendered to this call. She went to Calvin College and graduated with a nursing degree and then worked for a few years in Grand Rapids before heading to Tanzania, Africa to be a single missionary nurse. I remember rooming with her at Calvin College and noticing that she was very faithful about her time with the Lord. I did not have a regular time with God at that time, and it impressed me that she was so committed to that time. I even remember one time she had gotten in bed and then realized that she had not had her time with God. She got out of bed and got her Bible – it did not seem to be a duty, but a genuine desire to spend time with the One that she loved and who loved her.
Whenever Dawn would come back from Africa, the roommates who lived in Grand Rapids (there were six of us who roomed together at Calvin, but we were not all in the GR area after graduation) would get together and listen to Dawns stories of adventure. When we were all in our late 20's, I remember getting together with Dawn and the roommates at a restaurant. All of us, but Dawn, were married by this time and I remember Dawn expressing her desire to be married as well. She asked if we would pray for God to give her a husband. I remember thinking, "I will pray, but this seems quite impossible." All I saw were the barriers: 1) Dawn desired to be married to someone who had a passion for full-time missions which narrowed the pool of options in the US. 2) Dawn lived in a remote village with few other single male missionaries to choose from. Little did I know that "nothing is impossible with God".
Ryan traveled to Africa with a short term team and was given the assignment to (I'm a little fuzzy on the actual thing he was fixing) but I think it was a well. I just remember Dawn telling me that the first time she saw Ryan, he was covered in mud from head to toe. Ryan was only in her village for part of that day and I remember her saying that after she met him, she got on her knees in her bedroom and prayed – I think she prayed because she really thought that he could be the one and she just needed to give it to God! Again, details are fuzzy, but it seems to me that they ended up needing to travel together somewhere that day, just the two of them. The short story is that they fell in love and soon were married. God had given her a husband in answer to her and our prayers. I remember how all six of us roommates were at Dawn and Ryan's wedding – so fun. The interesting thing was that five of us were in different stages of pregnancy and Dawn was soon to be pregnant (Dawn and Ryan found out soon after their honeymoon that they were expecting!).
I remember their first visit to our home in Cedar Rapids when Caleb was a baby. They were on furlough traveling to churches and working on raising support to serve with AIM. We asked our church, Peace CRC Church, if Dawn and Ryan could speak at the evening service and they did. Following their time at Peace CRC, we planned to have a desert at our house for them to share more with those who were interested. I remember, prior to the church service, being so stressed about whether anyone would come to the desert, etc. I remember Dawn saying to me that it was really up to God if anyone would come and that I had no control over whether people would come or support them or whatever. Dawn has always been very blunt. God did lead one couple who attended the desert to financially support them. I remember talking with Ryan and Dawn during that visit about support raising because this process was so foreign to us. I remember Ryan talking about how much more you come to know God as your Provider when you are completely dependent on Him in this way. As he talked about this, I remember feeling like we were missing out on something. His comment has rung in my ears for many years. It was a year or two later when God led us to raise support to be a part of the ministry of FamilyLife. It was then that I really understood what he was talking about.
Ryan and Dawn had another son, Levi, and then little Seth. Prior to Seth's birth, Ryan and Dawn were debating about whether to have him in Africa or to travel back to the US. It could have been that they were close to furlough, I can't quite remember. Anyway, they felt most at peace about having him in the US and so they traveled back. A week or so after Seth's birth, Dawn felt sick with flu like symptoms. She was eventually hospitalized and doctors were scrambling to figure out what was going on because her condition quickly became critical. At first they wondered whether they were dealing with a tropical illness, but later determined that it was her appendix. By this time, her appendix had ruptured and she was at times close to death. I remember talking with her on the phone while she was in the hospital and I remember that I did not know what to say. I remember just listening and choking back tears as I listened to her weakened voice share with me the Bible verses people were sending her and how she was encouraged by them. Dawn was in the hospital for 6 weeks right after Seth was born and grieved missing his sweet infancy, their other little boys being old enough to know that Mommy was very sick. I remember talking with Ryan on the phone at that time too and he sounded depressed and distant, as one would imagine.
By God's amazing grace, Dawn made a full recovery. Ryan and Dawn came to visit us when Seth was around 3 or 4 months old. I remember Dawn saying during our visit that she was ready to have another baby. I then remember Ryan quickly saying, "we are NOT having another baby." We all laughed, but I was also just inspired by Dawn's courage. This particular visit occurred shortly after our withdrawal from FamilyLife. Dan and I were in a lot of pain at that time, really grieving. Ryan and Dawn listened and encouraged. I remember that during this visit, our conversations with Ryan and Dawn would often turn to cross-cultural missions and at this time we were not just asking about their lives, but also thinking and praying through whether this was God's call on our own lives. Ryan gave us some information to look through and really challenged and encouraged us to take the promptings we were receiving seriously. I remember standing with Ryan and Dawn at our front door and before they walked out of our home, I said to them, "You guys inspire us." I remember Ryan just smiling back. This was the last time we saw him. When Ryan and Dawn learned of our pursuing a call to Nicaragua, they were among the first to send in financial support. They encouraged us at the beginning of the support raising process by their giving and have reminded us by their example to continue to give generously as we receive generously.
This past month or so Dawn has been sending us updates about their adoption of Chloe. Chloe is a beautiful little African girl that they have been in the process of adopting. She has been living with them and has been a part of their family for the past few years. There was no guarantee that the adoption would go through and Ryan and Dawn's family were unable to leave Africa with her until her adoption was complete. So, Ryan and Dawn have not been back in the States for 3 1/2 years. Just a few weeks ago, Dawn was excited to share that Chloe's adoption was complete and that they just needed to work on getting her VISA before they returned to the States for furlough. Dawn and I emailed a bit about plans to get all the roommates and our families together next summer when she and Ryan would be in the States (we have never all been together with our kids and husbands before).
On Wednesday, August 5, Ryan was transported from the hospital in Kenya to a hospital in Johannesburg, South Africa that specializes in burn care. Dawn stayed back in Kenya to finalize the details of Chloe's travel VISA which she needed in order to take her with her. She wrote that the US embassy was very helpful and they were able to get it within in a couple of days. However, on Aug. 7, Dawn learned of Ryan's death as she boarded the plane to fly to Johannesburg to be with him. Dawn's face book entry reads, "My husband Ryan died Friday morning from injuries sustained in an airplane crash. He lived one week after the accident. I got to see him many times before he died. We are well. It is well with my soul." Dawn, my dear friend, you continue to inspire and challenge me with your resolve to surrender and trust and live a life of gratitude. I love you so much.
The evening of Aug. 8, I asked Will as I was tucking him into bed, "Would you like to pray for Ryan and Dawn's family, or would you like me to? He said, "How about you pray for them and I will pray for you." He prayed, "Dear God, please help Mom to think clearly. Please help her to be sad. And please help her to be happy that Ryan is in heaven with you."
Sunday morning in church we sang a song with lyrics that at one point repeat the phrase, "I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive." I felt anger and guilt rise in my heart as I thought, "yes, I am alive but Ryan is not." My thoughts were interrupted by God's whisper, "Lisa, Ryan is more alive than you are." Yes Lord, Will is right – we can be happy for Ryan, for how he is with you and for how he is more alive than we will ever be here on earth.
From Lisa Van Zoest:
I am at Dan's office today (on Aug. 8), with a need just to absorb and to process what has happened. I invite you today to remember Ryan and Dawn's life and their impact on our own with me. I have a pile of toilet paper next to me on the desk, as I know that this will not be easy. But, the mental health professional in me knows that it is necessary.
We do not currently have internet working at our house, so it has been difficult to keep up to date with what has been happening with Ryan since we arrived in Nicaragua. So, the last we were able to check was yesterday morning. At that time we picked up the message from Dawn saying that Ryan was "unstable" which was "very concerning". This morning, as I was waking up, Ryan was on my mind as he has been all week as I wake up. But, this morning was different. It felt to me that something was very wrong and I began praying with passion that God would save his life. After a few minutes of pleading with God, the thought occurred to me that if Ryan were to live, he would need to endure and work through a great deal of physical, emotional, and mental pain here on this earth. With that thought, I was able to surrender and ended my prayer with "not my will Father, but yours be done."
From there, I got up and asked Dan if he would check face book for me. He left the house to find an internet connection and when he came back, he said, "he passed away". These are just words a person is never ready to hear no matter how much you expect that it is a possibility. The kids were asking me questions shortly after I received this news, and I would look at them blankly and could not focus on what they were saying. I thought about Dawn and how she has four pairs of eyes looking up at her, asking questions that are so much more profound than, "Mom, could you cut my bagel?"
I've been reviewing in my mind throughout today the ways in which God used both Ryan and Dawn to influence our lives in regard to living lives of surrender to whatever God calls us to do – regardless of the cost. Dawn's call to missions came when she was just a little girl – I think she was 5 – and throughout her life, she was surrendered to this call. She went to Calvin College and graduated with a nursing degree and then worked for a few years in Grand Rapids before heading to Tanzania, Africa to be a single missionary nurse. I remember rooming with her at Calvin College and noticing that she was very faithful about her time with the Lord. I did not have a regular time with God at that time, and it impressed me that she was so committed to that time. I even remember one time she had gotten in bed and then realized that she had not had her time with God. She got out of bed and got her Bible – it did not seem to be a duty, but a genuine desire to spend time with the One that she loved and who loved her.
Whenever Dawn would come back from Africa, the roommates who lived in Grand Rapids (there were six of us who roomed together at Calvin, but we were not all in the GR area after graduation) would get together and listen to Dawns stories of adventure. When we were all in our late 20's, I remember getting together with Dawn and the roommates at a restaurant. All of us, but Dawn, were married by this time and I remember Dawn expressing her desire to be married as well. She asked if we would pray for God to give her a husband. I remember thinking, "I will pray, but this seems quite impossible." All I saw were the barriers: 1) Dawn desired to be married to someone who had a passion for full-time missions which narrowed the pool of options in the US. 2) Dawn lived in a remote village with few other single male missionaries to choose from. Little did I know that "nothing is impossible with God".
Ryan traveled to Africa with a short term team and was given the assignment to (I'm a little fuzzy on the actual thing he was fixing) but I think it was a well. I just remember Dawn telling me that the first time she saw Ryan, he was covered in mud from head to toe. Ryan was only in her village for part of that day and I remember her saying that after she met him, she got on her knees in her bedroom and prayed – I think she prayed because she really thought that he could be the one and she just needed to give it to God! Again, details are fuzzy, but it seems to me that they ended up needing to travel together somewhere that day, just the two of them. The short story is that they fell in love and soon were married. God had given her a husband in answer to her and our prayers. I remember how all six of us roommates were at Dawn and Ryan's wedding – so fun. The interesting thing was that five of us were in different stages of pregnancy and Dawn was soon to be pregnant (Dawn and Ryan found out soon after their honeymoon that they were expecting!).
I remember their first visit to our home in Cedar Rapids when Caleb was a baby. They were on furlough traveling to churches and working on raising support to serve with AIM. We asked our church, Peace CRC Church, if Dawn and Ryan could speak at the evening service and they did. Following their time at Peace CRC, we planned to have a desert at our house for them to share more with those who were interested. I remember, prior to the church service, being so stressed about whether anyone would come to the desert, etc. I remember Dawn saying to me that it was really up to God if anyone would come and that I had no control over whether people would come or support them or whatever. Dawn has always been very blunt. God did lead one couple who attended the desert to financially support them. I remember talking with Ryan and Dawn during that visit about support raising because this process was so foreign to us. I remember Ryan talking about how much more you come to know God as your Provider when you are completely dependent on Him in this way. As he talked about this, I remember feeling like we were missing out on something. His comment has rung in my ears for many years. It was a year or two later when God led us to raise support to be a part of the ministry of FamilyLife. It was then that I really understood what he was talking about.
Ryan and Dawn had another son, Levi, and then little Seth. Prior to Seth's birth, Ryan and Dawn were debating about whether to have him in Africa or to travel back to the US. It could have been that they were close to furlough, I can't quite remember. Anyway, they felt most at peace about having him in the US and so they traveled back. A week or so after Seth's birth, Dawn felt sick with flu like symptoms. She was eventually hospitalized and doctors were scrambling to figure out what was going on because her condition quickly became critical. At first they wondered whether they were dealing with a tropical illness, but later determined that it was her appendix. By this time, her appendix had ruptured and she was at times close to death. I remember talking with her on the phone while she was in the hospital and I remember that I did not know what to say. I remember just listening and choking back tears as I listened to her weakened voice share with me the Bible verses people were sending her and how she was encouraged by them. Dawn was in the hospital for 6 weeks right after Seth was born and grieved missing his sweet infancy, their other little boys being old enough to know that Mommy was very sick. I remember talking with Ryan on the phone at that time too and he sounded depressed and distant, as one would imagine.
By God's amazing grace, Dawn made a full recovery. Ryan and Dawn came to visit us when Seth was around 3 or 4 months old. I remember Dawn saying during our visit that she was ready to have another baby. I then remember Ryan quickly saying, "we are NOT having another baby." We all laughed, but I was also just inspired by Dawn's courage. This particular visit occurred shortly after our withdrawal from FamilyLife. Dan and I were in a lot of pain at that time, really grieving. Ryan and Dawn listened and encouraged. I remember that during this visit, our conversations with Ryan and Dawn would often turn to cross-cultural missions and at this time we were not just asking about their lives, but also thinking and praying through whether this was God's call on our own lives. Ryan gave us some information to look through and really challenged and encouraged us to take the promptings we were receiving seriously. I remember standing with Ryan and Dawn at our front door and before they walked out of our home, I said to them, "You guys inspire us." I remember Ryan just smiling back. This was the last time we saw him. When Ryan and Dawn learned of our pursuing a call to Nicaragua, they were among the first to send in financial support. They encouraged us at the beginning of the support raising process by their giving and have reminded us by their example to continue to give generously as we receive generously.
This past month or so Dawn has been sending us updates about their adoption of Chloe. Chloe is a beautiful little African girl that they have been in the process of adopting. She has been living with them and has been a part of their family for the past few years. There was no guarantee that the adoption would go through and Ryan and Dawn's family were unable to leave Africa with her until her adoption was complete. So, Ryan and Dawn have not been back in the States for 3 1/2 years. Just a few weeks ago, Dawn was excited to share that Chloe's adoption was complete and that they just needed to work on getting her VISA before they returned to the States for furlough. Dawn and I emailed a bit about plans to get all the roommates and our families together next summer when she and Ryan would be in the States (we have never all been together with our kids and husbands before).
On Wednesday, August 5, Ryan was transported from the hospital in Kenya to a hospital in Johannesburg, South Africa that specializes in burn care. Dawn stayed back in Kenya to finalize the details of Chloe's travel VISA which she needed in order to take her with her. She wrote that the US embassy was very helpful and they were able to get it within in a couple of days. However, on Aug. 7, Dawn learned of Ryan's death as she boarded the plane to fly to Johannesburg to be with him. Dawn's face book entry reads, "My husband Ryan died Friday morning from injuries sustained in an airplane crash. He lived one week after the accident. I got to see him many times before he died. We are well. It is well with my soul." Dawn, my dear friend, you continue to inspire and challenge me with your resolve to surrender and trust and live a life of gratitude. I love you so much.
The evening of Aug. 8, I asked Will as I was tucking him into bed, "Would you like to pray for Ryan and Dawn's family, or would you like me to? He said, "How about you pray for them and I will pray for you." He prayed, "Dear God, please help Mom to think clearly. Please help her to be sad. And please help her to be happy that Ryan is in heaven with you."
Sunday morning in church we sang a song with lyrics that at one point repeat the phrase, "I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive, I'm alive." I felt anger and guilt rise in my heart as I thought, "yes, I am alive but Ryan is not." My thoughts were interrupted by God's whisper, "Lisa, Ryan is more alive than you are." Yes Lord, Will is right – we can be happy for Ryan, for how he is with you and for how he is more alive than we will ever be here on earth.
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